I’ve been feeling like i’m stuck in a rut and decided to read this book “Switch”. I like how it makes Daniel Kahneman’s analogies of Systems 1 & 2 more relatable and specific to the topic of Change. Highly recommended!

There are so many great chapters that I found myself screen-shooting so many pages of the book so I can keep a copy with me even when it’s overdue. The Heath brothers describe the necessary conditions for successful change to happen.

Book Notes:

• There are basically 3 basic factors at play for change to happen successfully. A clear-headed Rider (your brain), a willing Elephant (your emotions) and a well-laid Path (your situation.)

RIDER

• The Rider is basically your brain. While it’s very useful for analyzing multiple options and situations, having too many options usually results leaving your brain in analysis paralysis.
• In situations where change is needed, too much analysis will doom the effect. Your Rider tends to focus on problems instead of solutions and will spin its wheels until you are given clear direction.
• That’s why to make progress on a change, you will need to direct the Rider. Show him how to act, what destination to pursue.
• Look for bright spots – when you feel overwhelmed by the current situation, take a step back and look for bright spots. These are the instances where change happened successfully despite of multitude of factors that contributed to the problem.
• Example: Jerry Sternin was tasked to solve Vietnam malnutrition issue and was given 6 months. He looked for mothers that had healthy kids even though they faced of all the problems all the other mothers do (e.g, poor sanitation, poverty, etc). In the end, he discovered it was because of certain local foods that these healthy kid mothers were adding to the porridge (i.e, small crabs that provided protein) and feeding habits (feed kids four times a day instead of twice so their bodies can absorb more nutrients).
• Jerry then created change based on the 3 factors, he drafted the necessary actions for mothers to change their feeding habits (RIDER), created social pressure and hope for the mothers to encourage them to change their feeding habits (ELEPHANT) and started communal cooking classes that were easy to sign up for (PATH)
• Important that he did not try to import a situation from another country, but looked towards the community for solutions so the locals would support and not look for excuses.
• Status quo feels comfortable and steady because much of the choice has been squeezed out. You have routines and your way of doing things, the Rider is on autopilot.
• Ambiguity is exhausting to the Rider, because the Rider is tugging on the reins of the Elephant, trying to direct the Elephant down a new path which is uncertain. Elephant will insist on taking the default path because uncertainty makes the Elephant anxious.
• Compelling vision is critical, but the paralyzing part for change is in the details.
• Scripting critical moves helps to translate aspirations to actions.
• You have to think of the specific behavior that you want to see in a tough moment and follow through. E.g. (Change from high to low fat diet by getting people to just buy 1% skim milk, use invasive options in surgery as resort.)
• Describe a compelling destination for Riders to correct the Rider’s greatest weakness of getting lost in analysis.
• Riders love the analyzing phase more than the doing phase and that’s dangerous if you are trying to change.
• If you worry about inaction, create B&W goals – marry your long term goal with short term critical moves. For example, rather than “eat less” (ambiguous), it’s more helpful to a B&W goal of “no more food after 8pm”.
• Rider has many strengths, such as sacrificing short term gratification for long term goals and is a clever tactician, but you have to give him a map so he can follow it perfectly. His flaws such as limited reserves of strength, his analysis paralysis can be mitigated by following bright spots and giving clear directions.

ELEPHANT

• When change works, it’s because leaders are speaking to the Elephant as well as the Rider.
• People think change happens in the ANALYSE – THINK – CHANGE order, but rather it is SEE – FEEL – CHANGE
• In most change situations, the parameters are not well understood and future is fuzzy
• You are not going to convince an unsure bride to by talking up tax advantages and rent savings
• You have to present a picture or evidence that makes you FEEL something. It might be a disturbing look at the problem, or a hopeful glimpse of the solution – something that hits you at the emotional level.
• Example: Target design executive Robyn Waters brought in trendy iMacs and M&Ms to let people ooh and ahh over them to show them how color could affect purchasing decisions. She wanted them to feel energized, hopeful, creative and competitive – they took the bait.
• We tend to take the rosiest interpretations of the facts for ourselves, which can be an enormous problem with regard to change.
• Before we can move in a new direction, we need to get a clear picture of where we are and how we’re doing.
• People tend to change only when a crisis compels them to , which implies we need to create a sense of fear or anxiety or doom. However, this only works in certain cases.
• Burning platform: fear can be a powerful motivator, especially if you need quick and specific action.
• However, most change is not a “stone-in-my-shoe” situation, but rather requires creativity, flexibility and ingenuity (e.g. how to improve a marriage)
• Positive emotions have their uses too: Joy leads us to play, which allows us to broaden the kind of things we are doing, like building resources and skills. Interest lends us to get involved and to tackle new experiences. Pride experienced when reaching personal goals broadens the kind of tasks we contemplate for the future and encourage us to pursue even bigger goals.
• Make people feel like they are closer to the finish line than they thought. People find it more motivating be partly finished with a longer journey than to be at the start of a shorter one.
• Shrink the change to make the Elephant feel like there is immediate payoff.
• 5 minute room rescue technique: instead of thinking of cleaning your whole house, get a kitchen timer and set it for 5 mins. In that time, start clearing a path and you can stop without a guilty conscience. Chances are you won’t stop after.
• Starting an unpleasant task is always worse than continuing it, so shrink the change and just do it.
• Useful tips when shrinking change: limit the investment (just 5 minutes) and think of small wins (milestones that are within reach).
• Engineer small wins at the beginning to engineer hope! Hope is precious in a change effort, it is Elephant fuel.
• Once people are on the path and making progress, its important to make their advances visible. Solutions focused therapists ask the “Miracle question” – e.g, imagine all your troubles were resolved, what would your morning look like? How would you know?
• You can create a miracle scale – “wow you’re already 20% of your miracle there!” Focus attention on small milestones that are attainable and visible rather than on the eventual destination which may seem remote.
• Change is more often than not, 1 small step forward, 1.3 steps back and 2.7 steps forward.. etc.
• No one can guarantee a win but the goal is to be wise about the things that are within our control (e.g, how we DEFINE the ultimate victory and the small milestones that lead up to it)
• Small wins should be 1) meaningful 2) within immediate reach.
• When a task feels too big, the Elephant will resist. Big changes come from a succession of small changes.
• The challenge is to get the important part of your self image and triggers the kind of decision making.
• Identities are central to decision making, any change effort that violates someone’s identity is likely doomed for failure.
• People adopt identities all the time, “e.g, mother, priest, scientist”. You can cultivate identities in people.
• For identity model of decision making, we tend to ask ourselves, “Who am I?” “What kind of situation is this?” “What would someone like me do in this situation?”. What’s missing is the calculation of cost and benefits.
• Failure is part of creating change. You need to create the expectation of failure en route, but not the mission itself. Have a growth mindset that reframes failure as a natural part of the change process.
• Our brains and abilities are like muscles that can be strengthened with practice. We are not born skateboarders or nurses.

PATH

Perhaps the most compelling factor for change to happen is for there to be a conducive environment to make the journey for both the Rider and Elephant easier. Create a steep downhill slope and give them a push. Remove some friction from the trail. Scatter a lot of signs to tell them they’re getting close. Shape the path for them.

• Self manipulation works. People eat less when you use smaller plates
• Haddon Matrix: Pre-event, event and post event to prepare for social and environmental factors
• People are incredibly sensitive to the environment and culture – the norms and expectations of communities that we live in.
• To change people and yourself, you have to change your habits, that’s why people usually change their environments (e.g, smokers find it easier to quit when they are on vacation.
• In cases where you can’t change the environment, you can use action triggers by preloading decisions to pass control of your behavior to the environment. E.g, I will call my mom after I drink my coffee in the morning.
• Action triggers have a profound power to motivate people to do the things they know they need to do. Action triggers triple the rate of success for hard goals. E.g, write down where to exercise and which days
• Habits are behavourial autopilots, to work, they need to to 1) advance the mission, 2) be relatively easy to embrace
• Use checklists to help yourself eliminate blindspots in a complex environement.
• As you try to make a switch, the hardest struggle will be to maintain your motivation, to keep your Elephant on the road. This puts a huge burden on your Rider to rein in your Elephant. It’s much easier if the Path is in your favour.
• Herd mentality: It’s much easier to persevere on a long journey when you’re travelling with a herd.
• In ambiguous situations, we all look to others for cues to tell us how to behave.
• Behavior is contagious, when someone becomes obese, the odds of the person’s close mutual friends becoming obese tripled!
• How to keep small steps to becoming consistent steps? First thing is to recognize and celebrate that first step.
• Animal trainers use approximations to set a behavioural destination to reinforce positive behaviours
• We need to be looking for bright spots and start rewarding them! If you want your boss or teammate to change, you have to be less stingy with the mango (rewards)
• Big changes start with very small steps. Small changes tend to snowball. When change works, it follows a pattern.
• People who change have clear direction, ample motivation and a supportive environment. 

For Singaporeans, this is a SUPER resource for you to read for free and it’s such a waste that not so many people know about it! I downloaded and read the book for free from Overdrive with my National Library Board (NLB) account. 🙂

How To: Borrow NLB eBooks using OverDrive App

https://eresources.nlb.gov.sg/Main/Help/Overdrive

We’re married!

Credits: @vampireval

It’s been almost 2 months since we tied the knot. To be honest, nothing much has really “changed” physically or financially. There is however, a sense of “shit, we’re in this together for real now forever, cause we said our vows in front of all our friends and family” and surprisingly, a closeness and affinity that I feel with Reuben now that he’s my official emergency contact / family.

I know how incredibly lucky I am to have found somebody I can share my dreams and life with for the rest of my life. It won’t be roses forever, but I’m cherishing every moment of our honeymoon period together.

In meantime, here’s a photo from our honeymoon in Croatia!

Finally posting all my travel pics! Grand Canyon was a long and tiring 4 hour drive from Vegas, with strong winds and ice-y rains. But I’m glad I went and got to see the magnificent Canyon. Just a peek into the views of Hoover Dam, Grand Canyon and Valley of Fire 🙂

That’s it! Not a bad way to start 2017, eh?

It’s 2017!

January’s over but here’s a little look into the crazy ride that was CES. Was interesting to have breakfast in front of the Bellagio, check out the crazy booths from tech companies around the world and experience Vegas for the first time.

In a world that increasingly preaches for you to travel, to spend on experiences, quit your job, leave your 9-5 hell, I thought I could share a little perspective on what the actual experience is like.

Travelling does not make your problems go away

The perks of travelling, feeling awed by mother nature.

Most people like February. It’s a short month and in Singapore, it’s Chinese New Year. But in particular, I think it serves as a sad reminder that January has come and gone. And the realisation that the resolutions that you made might not come to pass.

I’ve started working on my 5000 word fiction story. It’s based on a story I heard today from an old secondary school friend. It’s inspired by a true crime based in Singapore. I want to share it with you soon.

In meantime, here’s the crazy thing I did in January. Riding G-Max with my dear friend, Valerie.

I can’t believe it’s 2016.

Last year on this day, we were on a train back to Taipei from Hsinchu, in Taiwan. Lugging a backpack with all the belongings I’d needed, getting ready to finally come back home to Singapore and start my next adventure.

It’s been a tough year emotionally. Mainly because I didn’t keep promises I made to myself. There have been many great opportunities and transitions in 2015, and if I had to give a theme to my life this year, it’d be “The Year I Settled Back In Singapore. For Good.”

It’s strange because I thought that long-term travelling doesn’t really change you. But it did, it made me see that no matter where I was I could be doing what I’d actually wanted to do in Singapore, with abundant opportunity and no stress of having to cover for rent. It’s where my family, my friends, Reuben is. There is no urge for me to leave right now. It’s mostly about analysis-paralysis, my fear of failure and procrastination.

Philosophy has been a major source of comfort. Reading The School Of Life‘s newsletters and watching their YouTube videos have made me feel slightly better in my GYPSY narrative.

Now is a good time to reflect upon 2015.

Jan

January was the month where the magic of our Round-The-World Trip would end. We were so exhausted from travelling and were glad to be able to head home. It was bitter-sweet writing this epic recap of our trip on Medium, looking back on a year of travel around the world.  Looking back, I wish I took more time to write about our journey instead of the haphazard manner it was done on Let’s Go Loco, which has since been abandoned.

Despite telling myself that I wouldn’t go on another airplane so soon, I would find myself in Thailand, Philippines, Myanmar, China, Indonesia and Malaysia. The most pleasant of all the trips was in Boracay, Philippines where we celebrated Reuben’s birthday, and in Yangon, where old friends, Celeste, Yiwern and I re-united.

Feb

Went back to work part-time at JFDI.Asia. It’s THE accelerator program in Singapore and most possibly the only legit one in South East Asia. I was put to manage the content marketing and PR team and met some lovely people there. It made me see even clearer the inner workings of startups and how the odds are stacked against you even when you get some of the best help in Singapore. Hugh was also my lovely manager who allowed me to continue with our part-time arrangement as I started on Singapore Geek Girls stuff again.

SG Geek Girls talks were resumed and we started with Denisa Kera, an ex-professor of mine who  gave a fascinating talk about the maker-community and culture in Asia. She’s been a source of inspiration for me, breaking the stereotype that arts and science are separate entities, when in fact, it’s very much inter-disciplinary.

Link to her talk here: http://www.sggeekgirls.com/the-revival-of-the-mechanical-arts-in-the-maker-movement/

Mar

In March, I got an invite to attend an event called Stream Asia. It’s an unconference for the advertising industry in Asia and is organized by WPP. Strange that no matter how I tried to distance myself from the advertising world, I would come back to it.

WPP paid for the 3D2N stay at Club Med in Phuket and I got to meet some very interesting startups, including this company that developed an app for surgeons to practice surgery anytime, anywhere.

Special thanks to Gwen, who made this possible. I had a great time catching up with one of the most important mentors in my life. 🙂

Apr

A really busy month.

I finalized on my Xiaomi contract in early April and knew I had to make more effort to organize Geek Girls events while I could. I was really thankful when Anna and the guys at 12 Geeks spoke and co-organized the 2 events respectively.

Anna is a fantastic speaker. Her talk on the myths about the open source community really made me feel hopeful that it would be the perfect entry point for females to find more kindred spirits in the tech industry. I was pleasantly surprised by the number of engineers that attended the session as well! Many of whom had never gone to other tech meetups.

SG Geek Girls Maker Series #2: Anna Filippova: The Paradox of Open Source software

The second session was mostly impromptu. I asked the 12 Geeks men, Fazli and Luther, whether they’d be interested to host an arduino workshop and was really glad to tinker with the rest of the ladies around. One of them was working on a startup idea that would help you automagically feed your pets. An arduino was part of the prototyping phase.

Miraculously, Hugh still sent me to Cebu to meet with the lovely teammates I had there. I had a good time getting to know Crystal, from our content marketing team better. She’s a fantastic writer and inspired me to write for myself again. Here she is below (left) with our other intern, Cui (right).

May

Myanmar in May. It felt like forever since I saw Yiwern and Celeste together. We used to take a yearly trip, so it felt good to be able to reunite with them in Yangon.

There are some truly magnificent temples across Myanmar, possibly the most elaborate in the world. You can tell Myanmar’s a sleeping dragon, but a lot’s to come in the next 20 years. I’m glad I saw it before the rest of the world did.

And just like that, I started my full-time job in Xiaomi and within the next week, I flew to Beijing to start my 3 month stint learning from the Mi Community team and employee #9, Da Li, who pain-stakingly created the vibrant community that Xiaomi has in China. Perhaps I’ll write what I’ve learnt from him later, when I’ve the time to organize my thoughts.

Jun

June come and went in a frenzy as I struggled to get used to work in Xiaomi. I’m grateful that the company allowed me to return home once a month to continue with SG Geek Girls activities. I’m even more grateful for Laura, our fantastic Android App Coach, who had a great session with the ladies who attended and taught them how to create a temperature monitoring app. I was really proud of them.

Jul

My birthday month was extra special because of a spontaneous trip to 海坨山, or Sea Dolphin Mountain, somewhere in the outskirts of Yanqing County. I signed up on a whim with my Beijing colleagues and to my surprise, found myself totally awed by the views on the mountain. We trekked in rain but were rewarded with a sea of clouds, colorful tents and an unbelievable sunset. One of the best I’ve seen in my life.

At SG Geek Girls, we had the pleasure of hosting Cindy Lin, another maker. Her talk blew my mine with it’s inter-disciplinarian perspective on the maker culture and spirit.

Cindy’s made art with snail poo, created her personal lubricants, and created a community of tinkerers, enthusiasts and amateurs in Singapore creating a space of transient food fancy and bacteria economies. Her networks and experiments in Indonesia and Shenzhen gave a great overview of the maker movement across Asia.

Make sure you check out her super interesting talk:

http://www.sggeekgirls.com/snails-herbs-and-ibu-ibu-recounting-transnational-tinkering-moments-with-cindy-lin/

Aug

I attended my first Xiaomi product launch event in August. It was so well executed and the love from the fans in China was overwhelming. They were crowding all over the community team post-drinks and had such a genuine interest to get to know us. It’s nice to feel appreciated.

I really missed home on National Day. Which I spent in the Singapore embassy, with other cool Singaporeans in Beijing!

Sep

I don’t really remember much about September, except that I appeared in that month’s issue of Cosmo. And wore a $2000 dress. It was a funny experience, but so unlike me. I don’t think I’d do it again. Just not much of a power poser.

Oct

In early October, I felt I finally got what I came for when I was given the chance to sit in Lei Jun’s lecture of Xiaomi’s vision and the company’s history. His passion for life, technology and his humble, honest outlook makes me believe that the world doesn’t need to be filled with entrepreneurs who are dicks like Donald Trump. He talked a lot about the importance of community building in this session with many examples, and made me feel even more hopeful that Xiaomi’s not a company that only pays lip service to it’s customers.

Somehow, Reuben and I also got featured in this Channel News Asia short about our one year travel. Another first for me. A Singaporean couple emailed us after this, telling us they’re also on their trip! Amazing.

Nov

My first Xiaomi Global product launch was in KL, Malaysia. Really liked working with the bigger team and was amazing how it came together!

For Reuben’s birthday, I surprised him with a trip to Boracay, Philippines. It didn’t disappoint with its white powder sandy beaches and cliff diving. Was a good way to test out the Yi Action Cam too!

By now I was feeling immensely guilty for not having planned a SG Geek Girls event for long enough. So I did, with my long-time friend Tan Liren, who shed some important light on the importance of design innovation in Healthcare. Liren’s amazing at her job as UX lead at Alexandra Healthcare (based in Khoo Teck Phuat Hospital), giving some great real world examples of how simple design changes can make big differences in our habits.

Dec

I hit a few work milestones in December, throwing an oversubscribed party, proving that the intangible work we do leads to sales. It’s heartening to see that hardwork pay off. I’m going into 2016 more confident of my abilities and maintaining the “do-the-right-thing” attitude that Lei Jun has set for all Xiaomi employees.

A perfect way to end the year was meeting with Sandra, a travelmate we met in Argentina, Chile and now in Singapore! Her friend, Flo, is doing her 6 month trip across the world now too. It just feels like it’s all come full circle. Slightly surreal too to have brought her for Tau Huay and Char Kway Teow in a hawker center. 

Thanks for letting me settle down, 2015.

2016, I’m ready for you. Bring it on.

Now that Reuben and I are in the process of getting a new place, I’m obsessed with surfing home decor websites. We applied for a tiny 3-room HDB flat at Joo Seng Road, not far away from my parents’ place.

My table in my current room, inspired by the Berlin apartment we stayed in. $169 from Ikea.

After sleeping in strangers’ apartments around the world for a year, you’d think it’d be easy for me to decide what style I’d want to go for. But there are so many choices out there that I can’t really put my finger on it – Japanese Zen, Scandinavian Chic (this seems particularly popular at the moment), Minimalist / Essentialist / Quirky / Eclectic.

It seems that I’ve gotten it all wrong. It hit me that this was a great opportunity for me to re-create a space that I’d always wanted to live in, even though I couldn’t physically be in the country. Then it struck me – hands down, it would be Berlin.

Berlin? Yes, Berlin. From the minute I stepped into the youthful, spirited, hipster capital of Germany, I knew this would be one of the places I’d want to spend some part of my life in. And although it was a short 3 weeks, Reuben and I had a fantastic time living in it – meeting programmers, artistes, lying on the grass on Tempelhof Park. We both agreed that this would be the place we wouldn’t mind living in if we had to choose one for RTW.

Our Berlin Apartment

Our Airbnb apartment in Berlin, my table at home now has the exact same legs.

Again, from our Airbnb apartment in Berlin with the poofi-est and most comfortable bed

Berlin apartments share very similar traits. They are always functional, frugal, yet remain very cosy and inviting. The warm wooden hues of their floors and cupboards coupled with the sunlight that Germans love letting into their homes really go well together. The table is also a drafting board and the pretty scarf, a cool deco piece for the room.

Our homes have a tremendous impact on our well-being, both physical and mental. I like the idea that a home reflects the values you hold dear. For me, it should enable us to create and make things, be a space to share cosy moments, remind us that some of the most important things in life are those that money can’t buy.

Here are more photos I found online of this quirky, cosy, Berlin home.

Credit: http://decor8blog.com/2009/09/02/beautiful-berlin-apartment/

What do you think?

It just hit me that it’s 2016 next year. The final year of my 20s. Yes, I’ll be 29 in 2016.

To commemorate the blast of a ride I’ve had, I’ve decided to list 12 crazy/things-I’ve-always-wanted-to-do-but-haven’t in 2016. I’ll do one thing a month. Sounds do-able, right?

Here are my 12 things for 12 months of 2016:

Update: 2.30am, Friday, 23 September.

1. Dye my hair a totally different and new color I’ve never had. Get red / grey highlights. Just cause. (Done)
2. Learn how to draw. I signed up for a Visual Diary Workshop by Public Garden: http://www.public-garden.com/projects/workshop/visual-diary-travellers-workshop-goh-huiying-0 (Done)
3. Write everyday for a month and publish it here. It could be a sentence. A paragraph. An essay. But write. I. Must. (TO DO)
4. Write a 5,000 word short story or essay. (WIP)
5. Go sky diving in New Zealand. (Went to NZ but didn’t skydive – half done, will have to do Sentosa version instead)
6. Register a company. Any company. (TO DO)
7. Learn how to cook 5 fancy dishes properly. (WIP)
   Ngoh Hiang // Pork Lasagne // Udon Noodles // Taiwanese Sesame Chicken // ?
8. Take a photo everyday for a month. (Done. On Instagram. Not a month, but it’s definitely motivated me to post more than 90 photos on Instagram this year!)
9. Grow my own plant. Any plant. (Done. Terrarium from Daffy and Jas)
10. Read 10 books. (10/10): (Done)
    Midnight in Siberia // Start Something That Matters // How To Live In The City // How To Be Bored //  Wonder //  Its Not How Good You Are, It’s How Good You Want To Be // Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear// Black Coffee // Essays in Love // The Course of Love // The Sirens of Titan (WIP) // The Artist’s Way (WIP) // Kafka On The Shore (WIP) // The Art of Thinking Clearly
11. Write a short letter a day for someone I’m thankful for in my life for a week. (TO DO)
12. Reverse Bungee (Done)

I’m leaving #12 empty. For suggestions and spontaneity. Please feel free to comment and let me know what you think 🙂

Have a smashing 2016 everyone!

Society’s demands on our generation are crazy.

I graduated at age 24, slightly older than my peers because I spent an extra year in university for exchange programs. I’m 28 now, just shy of 2 years to hitting the big 30, but it made me think a lot about what I’m expected to achieve by then.

I’ve always thought of 30 as a definitive milestone in life. This is the age where you are supposed to know what you want to do with your life. By now you are expected to have found a life partner, bought a house, get married, have your first kid, achieved some sort of career milestone, lived out all your crazy adventures such as travelling the world, or exited your startup by selling it for millions.

Maybe it’s because of the pressure from friends that I hang out with, or the people I look up to, but damn, that’s a lot to have accomplish by 30. When I look at what I’ve done, it’s easy to feel dejected. Wtf have I achieved? I haven’t started my own company and I’m definitely not any closer to earning millions. I think a lot of people my age feel the same way.

Nobody told me that I’d only have 6 years before I would be expected to accomplish all these feats. And it’s crazy – this rat race.

I’m trying to focus on the things that I have accomplished. Travelled around the world for a year, found someone who I can live the rest of my life with. Be on track to buy a house. Found work at an exciting startup with big dreams. But it never seems to be enough.

Crazy, right?